So, I am now on day 2 of 101. The first day, I focused on better understanding what the program entails and also did some g0al-setting. I looked at the goals I have for myself in 10 years, 5 years, 3 years, 1 year and 100 days. It was an interesting process for me. I was very clear about the goals 10 years out. I was also very clear about the goals for the next 100 days and the next year. Where it got muddy, was in the 3-year and 5-year area. It was a challenge for me to break the goals into steps in a way that made sense to me. I kept going back and forth and adjusting things until it made sense. Anyway, it was a good learning process for me.
I have decided to spend a lot more time with myself. I spend a lot of time helping others, enjoying the company of others etc. I very rarely give myself time. I have known this for a while and I have done better over the last few years. Now, I'm realizing just how much I really need that time.
Last night I began to feel exhausted, as if my adrenals were out of whack. I came home around 6:30 and went straight to my room to take a nap. I woke up around 8:30, still feeling tired. I didn't let myself sleep longer because I knew I needed to get dinner taken care of. So, I got up and made a simple, quick dinner. Afterward, I stayed up for a few hours talking with my roommates, playing around on the computer and watching a little TV. I went to bed around 11:30.
This morning, I woke up feeling tired. Once I got the kids up, I got into a conversation with someone about some things they discovered that are going on in America that sound pretty bad. As I was listening to what they were sharing, I started to notice my energy level going down drastically. I could feel my body reacting to the negative information!!!
Recently, I've been really connecting to the importance of being very careful about the things that I choose to focus on. I believe that there are two processes going on in the world. One process is the disintegration of old ways of living, thinking and being, which does not suit humanity. The other process is the building up of a new way of living, thinking and being, which is in alignment with the next stage of evolution for mankind. Both processes are necessary. Both processes are part of the Divine Plan.
What I'm realizing is that I can choose to focus on either of these processes (or both) and whichever process I put my thoughts and energy into will be accelerated, emphasis, made larger etc. So, I have recently committed myself to focusing on that which creates peace, harmony, growth and love. I choose that because those are the feelings and circumstances I choose for myself. I feel it is pointless to put too much emphasis on the crumbling of the old ways. I am not surprised when I hear about horrible things going on in the world because I am well aware that there is a process of disintegration going on. So, there is no need for me to belabor the difficulties of the world. I feel my energy is best used when I am contributing to the spiritualization of the planet; the healing of the world and it's peoples; the upliftment and inspiration of myself and those around me. I choose to see light in a world of darkness. I believe that this is the only choice that causes me to be healthy, strong, powerful and full of light.
Having said all of that, I can go back to the conversation about the world that I was having earlier. When I realized that I was beginning to feel badly, I decided to share how I was feeling and to end the conversation. Fortunately the person understood and the conversation ended. However, I realized that ending the conversation wasn't enough. I could feel my energy continuing to drain. I felt frustrated and emotional. That was when I realized I needed to take real steps to shift this energy.
I took about 15 minutes and did EFT (emotional freedom tapping) on myself. I released the emotions that I was feeling and re-established my feelings of joy, love and well-being. I then took a moment to pray. I felt much better, though there was still some residual negative energy from earlier. So, after I dropped my son off at school, I decided to go to Kenneth Hahn National Park and walk the trails. I knew that being in nature would help to ground me and get my energy level back up. It was quite a healing experience. I am thankful that I had the awareness and the tools to shift my energy.
I believe that it is crucial for all of us to set our personal boundaries. Define clearly what thoughts, energy, experiences, conversations and people we choose to have in our lives. I have decided to become very serious about protecting my joy. In order for me to be a light to my children, my family, my friends and the world, I must protect my own self. I must only allow for experiences that create joy, love, well-being and growth. I'll follow Christ's example and "let the dead bury the dead".
I'll continue to update my experience during The 101. If anyone is interested in checking it out for yourself, it is free and you can sign up at www.lifewrite.com
Blessings!!
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